Oh, Poor Atlas

I think, I think this is what it feels like to bite off more than you can chew. I do believe this is what being overwhelmed feels like. Hear me out.

It's become a night and day kind of deal that I'm emailing my officers, texting Student Foundation members, finishing papers, studying, endless studying, and searching for the ever evasive down time. I literally went to go pick up my roommate 20 minutes early the other day just so I could sit in my car by myself and do nothing. I know, it's weird, but this is what it's come to.

Classes are laughably impossible, extra-curriculars are starting to drown me and I drink so much coffee, my hands are always shaking. My advisor/professor/savior is constantly asking me if I'm okay because I seem a little stressed and I either manically laugh or just brush it off, depending on whether or not I'm looking at my to-do list.

Alright, whining aside, I think I really like this. Sure, I've tried to get out of every major events I've been asked to attend, I had to buy a blazer and had my first day off in weeks yesterday, but there's still that thrill of perpetually moving, being the one in charge and learning learning learning every day. I'm excited for the changes that are directly because of me, for the events in which I will meet the cream of the crop. I'm friends with some of the most important people on campus, am one of those people not to toot my own horn.

Of course, it figures that my best year will be my last at Texas State, but I don't care. Besides having little time to think about graduation and life post-undergrad, I just can't focus on the future right now, as ostrich-sticking-head-in-the-sand as that is. The reality is that my present is too fun, too exhausting and too demanding to worry about what will come in May. So as I finish up a Spanish composition and field questions about who is bringing the sodas to the Comm Club meeting tomorrow and organizing a study session for Rhetorical Criticism, I revel in what my days are filled with and just enjoy the ride.

Till the Sun Turns Black

So I'm sitting in a coffee shop, waiting for some girls from my rhetorical criticism class for a study group. Thus, a blog should be produced. Well, at least before a study guide is.

I suppose the reason I haven't been posting much is that I haven't had a lot to say. There's lots going on (last week alone I met 5 famous people. Crazy.) I've been insanely over the moon about the weather change, it's intense. I never thought I'd miss a season as much as I miss winter, but there you go.

Something interesting that's happening with the weather change is how much I miss Australia. I miss it every single day, often more than once, and I want to go back so badly. I had said I didn't want to go back to Sydney, but maybe Melbourne and Adelaide, but I miss my home in Sydney. I miss walking down to the cafe for pain au chocolate and a latte. I miss taking the bus. I miss my crappy, little hostel with its warm bed and odd inhabitants. Nothing like an overcast sky and cool breeze to make me miss winter in Sydney.

School is school, I can't stop telling people it's crazy, which is the truth. I've never had to push myself this hard and have never wanted to do less work. Senioritis is real, except this time it's the opposite; I do not want to leave school, so hard work and doing well only means the minutes until graduate come all the more quickly. Therefore, I avoid all. So far...it's not working.

Alright, the girls are here, so I should go. But, the bottom line I'm selling is that I'm crazy, but I'm really happy. So there's that.