Yesterday, we went to our favorite local cafe down the street, but were too tired to walk so we took the bus. I pressed the button to alert the driver that we needed to get off and instead of stopping at the next stop, he slammed on his brakes and we all almost fell forward. It was intense.
So yeah, that cold trickle of fear that soon I have to leave this city, and face the very real possibility that I might never come back, has started to be at the forefront of my mind. Tonight, on the bus ride home from the aquarium, I kept glancing into all these bars, restaurants, even mini marts that I have yet to explore. Granted, most of them probably aren't even worth more than that glance, but I keep fearing for the lost possibilities of what they could be worth. Even going down Glebe Point Rd, the street the hostel is on, there are a hundred reminders of how this city can be given proper justice in a mere month.
That's another thing that gets me about traveling, is the almost overwhelming amount of insignificance I feel whenever I venture into a new city. From a street to a nation, I feel as if I still don't know Australia and that I could spend a lifetime here and still be in the dark of so much that it holds. Then I expand that thought to everywhere else I would kill to visit; Paris, Rome, Prague, Athens, Rio de Janeiro, Cairo, Portland, Amsterdam, Moscow, Chicago, New Orleans, Bali, Capetown, and about a thousand other places I couldn't even begin to imagine. Traveling always makes me itch for more travel, but it also floods me with how very small I am compared to this world and it makes me want nothing more than to stay at home, happy in my small towns.
However, this city is now a part of me, because I have been a part of it. I have spent these last few weeks attempting to memorize everything I see to keep with me forever, because Sydney is too beautiful to forget. My hands tremble at the mere thought of never returning to Australia, but as many of my classmates say, there are too many other places to go to think about returning here. I have come to know the very depth of Australiana, and truly wish I could come back with everyone I know and love to show them how exceptional this place is.
So as people grumble, tensions and stress running high, I smile on, loving this city, this country. Missing home is evident in waiting awkwardly for the bathroom, wishing more than anything for filtered water, and a thousand other things that could hardly be called luxuries. For now, I cringe at the thought of leaving Sydney and snap one more photo, because the thousand I have just aren't enough.
