So a week before I left for school I went to my sister's hair stylist, Carolyn, and we started talking about leaving home and college and she surprised me with a tidbit fact.
"Two weeks. If you can get through two weeks, you're good."
I laughed at the time and thought two weeks would be cake. Well, I cheated a little by going home this weekend, but I think it still counts as a two week rule and I'm free. But as the two weeks are coming to a close, I can feel it. The pressure in my chest, the strange dreams, and all the other signs that are telling me that I am missing someone or something. I'm somewhat of a connoisseur of missing things so I can read the signs quite easily. I feel this tug deep inside and I know that these next few days will be rough. But as much I see these signs, I know I have to ignore them that much more, and figure out how to just live with it.
I'm finding it easier to forgot these baby bouts of depression here. Maybe it's that I'm getting older or maybe because I have no other choice, but it's easier to push these sad thoughts away and just focus on the positives, like how much I love my Anthropology class. I know that everything will come together and the missing part will fade slightly (not completely, of course) . It's just, for now, I am appreciating the irony of how very right Carolyn was.
P.S. The hope of seeing you soon really helps, too.
1 comment:
Oh Emma, you have become such a wonderful adult. I can't wait to read your comments and insights each day. I hope your classes take you as far and high as you can go. xoxo miss susan
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